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Ho Ho Ho.... No!

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D3terioNation

D3terioNation

Grizzled Veteran
Dec 15, 2005
3,955
82
43
West Sussex, UK
#1
It is Christmas Eve and this chap is on a rooftop about to jump off.
His wife is leaving him for another man, he has lost his job and
He owes thousands of pounds to the bank.
Just as he finishes his prayers and closes his eyes,
ready to jump, Father Christmas taps him on the shoulder
"Are you OK?" asks Father Christmas.
The man explains why he is so miserable and gets ready to jump.
"Stop!" shouts Father Christmas. "It is Christmas, I will grant you
three wishes to solve your problems on the understanding that you
will grant me a small favour in return!"
"Would you?" the man replies. "That would be wonderful!!...Thankyou,

 Father Christmas promises him that:
1. You shall go home in 1 hour and your wife will be dressed in her
 sexiest underwear, begging for forgiveness and longing for your
return,she will have no recollection of her new boyfriend.
2. You shall go into work tomorrow, sit at your desk and continue withyour work. Your salary will have increased by 50%.
 Also, nobody will have any recollection of your sacking.
3. You shall go to your bank and you will be ten thousand pounds incredit, you will have no outstanding bills.
"Oh thank you, thank you!" says the man.
"What is it that I can do for you?"
Father Christmas asks the man to drop his pants and bend over.
After a quite brutal rogering, which made his eyes water a little,
Father Christmas asks the man how old he is.
"36" replies the man.
"Ho, Ho, Ho, You're a bit old to believe in Father Christmas aren't
you!?"
chuckled the fat g@y b*stard in fancy dress
 
#6
Lizardhands said:
I object to the way the word "gay" is used with negative implications.
Click to expand...
hrm, well the world isnt always nice, and its not like theres a law against using a word with negative implications.

And I object to the religion and gender insensitive use of the name "Father Christmas". Please edit the text to "Legal guardian Holiday-person"...Today 01:58 PM
hrmm numba 2: its a christian holiday, dont like it, go cellibrate some other holliday, but until you tell the jews, the muslims, commiez and the neo nazis that they name their hollidays the proper name and have to give them a pollitically correct name .. well yeah ............

HAHA!! jk to both of you .. i know your posts were jokes...
 
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#11
Patrons of the Red Orchestra Forums,

I have been greatly insulted by the use of the word "christmas." Here in the US it is now illegal to say "[Merry] Christmas" where others can hear you, and I will certainly be phone and computer-tapped (if I haven't been already) for having typed it and read it on my computer. If you must, say father "Holidays" or "Parent Rama-hanna-kwanz-mas."

Thank you,
George Marion,
aka Capt.Marion




Just ****ting you, I am very opposed to how uptight everyone here in the states are getting about "Freedom of speech" and separation of Chruch and State.
 
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#20
I have been greatly insulted by the use of the word "christmas." Here in the US it is now illegal to say "[Merry] Christmas" where others can hear you, and I will certainly be phone and computer-tapped (if I haven't been already) for having typed it and read it on my computer. If you must, say father "Holidays" or "Parent Rama-hanna-kwanz-mas."
Click to expand...
Another sick freak or just an odd coincidence?
 
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